ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

[Wreckless]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

I got alot of dick ones for some reason too.

Sleeping on the couch having one of them good dreams and my mom throws a sandal at me. I look down and my winky's saying hello standing tall out of my boxers......

Going to the store for smokes half awake and wearing mesh shorts. Not realizing it until I get in the proper light that my shorts are completely see thru. Turn around, get back in the car and leave...

Junior High dances getting called out with the "What's that?" slow dancing with girls with a massive erection because their soft girl skin.

[Xplisit]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

When I was 14, I was dating this girl and she used to always sneak me into her house at night and I'd leave like 4am, ride my bike home, sneak in bed before my grandparents knew I left, take a shower, and head to school. Sometimes I'd do it on a Saturday night, leave while her dad is in the shower, then "knock on the door" and he'd take me to church with them and out for ice cream after. The nigga loved me, even let me drive her PT cruiser more than she did when we went out. One day we got into a huge argument and she wouldn't answer my phone or talk to me on AIM (fuck yeah, back in the AIM days). I went over to her house unannounced to talk to her and eventually she let me come inside to talk to her because her folks were about to come home. So that entire night we don't even fuck. I fall asleep in my gym shorts and her dad comes in (in some fuckin old man whitey tighteys) at like 5am to wake her up for school. I hear the door open and try to become as flat as possible under the sheets... WONDER TWIN POWERS ACTIVATE! FORM OF PAPER! He throws the blanket off and deathstares into my soul. I was 100% for sure he was gonna murder me. He ends up taking me to my grandparents house and telling them that I broke into his house and forced his daughter to have sex or some weird shit and walked out my front door saying "I'LL SEE YOU IN COURT!" He never spoke to me again after that even though I dated his daughter on and off for 5 more years.

I also had a similar story with another girl I dated, except it was her mom that found us, and I was butt-ass-naked this time fucked up on zannies. Apparently when she ripped the cover off, I cussed her out and told her to let me sleep. I don't remember this, but I was told the story numerous times. Her mom was the best too. When I graduated, she took me out to dinner at outback steakhouse, then took me shopping and spent $500+ on clothes. And she was always tryna put me onto her daughter, I guess she didn't like seeing it actually happen in front of her eyes though.

Moral of the story: Don't let the parents see you otherwise you'll fuck up your ice cream and outback steakhouse connects.

[Bit G.W. Persson]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

The making fun of ppls appearance while hiding ur own is def retarded imo

def something for ugly mugs

[larry word]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

fucking DEAD @ "dam that woulad hurt if i wasnt gay" oh my od

[convict]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

[MENTION=4540]Notsure[/MENTION] ur a cunt of epic proportions and it is clear at this point that ur stepfather handcuffs you to a radiator and rapes u. Repeatedly

[CoolAsFuck]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

2nd post. Fuck it though. Shit just happened Wed. also.

So in the search of some easy POF pussy, I decided to rapid fire every bitches inbox and see who bites the line.......on plenty of fish... (This comment is actually pretty fuckin cringeworthy tbh) Anyway, some lightskinned bitch hits me up with nothin but face pics and shit which let me know she was a fat bitch. Wasn't even sweatin it though cause I'm in a 3 week drought. Anyway, after the normal exchanging of pics and shit (May I add this bitch was actualy pretty in the face but built like fuckin Rodney Dangerfield ) threw me the fuck off. Few nights later I get to her crib, bitch is standing outside holding an infant. As we were talking, two more kids come at the door saying "Mama, etc etc" Then she made a comment to the effect of her having to put her youngest son to bed. Bitch was a human reverse abortion clinic pretty much. Ill part was I was STILL debating on smashing, but the bitch said she had to go in the house to do something, I'm waiting, about 5 minutes pass and it's becoming clear that I'M the one being rejected. She came back out looking surprised I was still there and made some shit up about having to takke the kids out to get them tired. I took the hint and removed myself from the situation quick as fuck. Did not smash, DID play Hall and Oates on the way home though. Basically, I was rejected by a big bitch with four kids and ended up finding some bangbros passes on another go to forum to round off the shame of the night lol.

Tl;dr : Almost fucked a human build-a bear. Was rejected by said bear.

[Breh123]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

u soft hearted bitch y u do dis to us [MENTION=2906]Dunk[/MENTION] ?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?

D: D: D:

[You're Peen]

Re: ITT: you post your own cringe worthy stories

[MENTION=4540]Notsure[/MENTION]